How I Feel (In 5 Photos) Wednesday.

"When you figure out love is all that matters after all, it sure makes everything else...seem so small." --Carrie Underwood

[Photos via Chasing Pavements]

Tuesday Update.

I've had a tough time of it these past few days. I've been feeling more depressed and more anxious, and for the life of me, I can't figure out why. My thinking is still foggy too, which has been frustrating, to say the least. I feel like my mind isn't even working sometimes. It's so easy to say, "Oh, it's just the depression," but it's quite another to feel it in your heart and actually believe it. My heart just doesn't seem to want to catch up to my head for some reason.

I'm scared, actually. I'm scared the depression is going to take hold again and pull me down. I'm scared I'm never again going to be the person I used to be. I've lost interest in so many hobbies and activities that I once enjoyed, and that in itself scares me to no end. Will I ever like those things again? It's like everything I've ever known has been thrown upside, and nothing ever seems to make sense. I just want to scream to the depression, "Give me my life back," and magically have everything right with the world again.

Thanks for listening today, friends! xoxo

[Photo via Just Be Splendid]

Birthday Balloon Wishes.

Lillian is, hands-down, one of the sweetest bloggers out there. So it came as no surprise to me when I read about what she did to help celebrate a friend's 24th birthiday.

She took 24 brightly colored balloons...

...and attached sincere and heartfelt wishes to each one. Isn't that a neat idea? It's so creative, and I love that it's straight from the heart. Way to go, Lillian!

[Photo taken by Lillian]

Man Candy Monday.

Hello, friends! How is your lovely Monday going? Now I'll be the first to admit that I may be a bit behind in noticing this guy. I know you're probably wondering, "Well, how can that be?" I don't know either, but I do know that this guy is charming and above all funny, which you know makes me very, very weak in the knees...

BRADLEY COOPER!!!!!!!!!!

House Hunters.

Have you guys ever watched the show House Hunters? They follow people as they're in the process of hunting for a new house. My mom had a cold this week, and she got addicted to this show while resting one afternoon. Now, she's got both my sister and me addicted to it. We'll record them throughout the day and then have a House Hunting marathon at dinner. It's become our new tradition.

What shows are you loving right now? xoxo

How I Feel (In 5 Photos) Wednesday.

"'Cause baby you're a firework. Come on show 'em what you're worth." --Katy Perry

[Photos via Chasing Pavements]

Tuesday Update.

In thinking back over the last week, I'm honestly not sure how I feel about it. It's strange - and I've probably mentioned this before - because my mom and sister both have said they notice that I'm slowly getting better. And yet, I still feel like I don't see it or even feel it. It's like I'm waiting for this grand, cosmic moment where everything is suddenly going to click and make sense again. It's probably not like that, is it? It's not like in the movies where the main character has a life-changing epiphany and suddenly understands everything. It's not like a sitcom where the problems are neatly resolved in 22 minutes.

And yet we all hope for that, don't we? We all hope that this path we're on leads us to those sorts of moments - those moments of clarity where all is right with the world. I wrote in my journal yesterday that all I want is to be happy. The way I used to be. And that's what it boils down to, I suppose. A happy day is what I'm striving for right now. Or, at the very least, a day where my head isn't so weighed down with worries.
I've also been thinking about my disability a lot, probably fueled in part by the depression. I feel like I've lost a lot of self-confidence when it comes to issues surrounding my disability. I see my peers immersed in their jobs, getting married and having kids, and I can't help but feel out of place. They all have lives of their own and I feel so lost in the world. Where is my place? Why haven't I checked these items off my life list yet? I know, I know. There's really no set milestones that apply to everyone. If that's so, then why do I feel so far behind everyone else? Maybe I'm coming to terms with my disability and what that is going to mean for my life.

Do these sorts of questions ever run through your mind, friends? Thanks for listening. xoxo

[Photos via Audrey Hepburn Complex]

Man Candy Monday.

Once again, it's Monday, friends. I hope you're still enjoying Man Candy because today is one of my favorites. What I love about this guy is that he sort of flies under the radar. He's not one of those big Hollywood types, and he wouldn't have it any other way. He's dashing. He's darling. And he's incredibly talented...

TYLER HILTON!!!!!!!!!!

Polo Shirt Season.

I did something very rebellious yesterday, friends. I'm not talking on the grand scale of theft or anything because you know I'm a goody-goody at heart, but I did do something I wasn't supposed to do. Well, not until April 1 anyway. It was sort of a tradition for me. I broke that tradition yesterday by...

Wait for it...

I broke out my first polo shirt of the season yesterday. With wild abandon, actually. You remember how much I'm in love with polo shirts, don't you? I mean, how could you ever forget? So, friends, what do you think of this snazzy red polo shirt? And aren't you glad spring is coming? xoxo

Comfy Chairs.

Now these are the kinds of chairs I could sit in for hours. Don't they look comfortable?

Sorry for the short post today, friends. It's been a long day at work. Ever have one of those days? xoxo

[Via Pinterest]

How I Feel (In 5 Photos) Wednesday.

"He's leaving on that midnight train to Georgia..." --Gladys Knight

[Photos via dreaming]

Tuesday Update.

My friends, this past week has been more of the same. I have good days and not-so-good days. I'm still having trouble concentrating, and even writing this is a bit of a struggle. It's almost as if my mind is making its way through fog, and it hasn't reached the other side yet. It's frustrating when I remember how I used to be and then start thinking of how I feel now. It's scares me, to be honest.

Although. I did go see Unknown and out for ice cream this weekend, so that was a plus. I have to be grateful for the little things, right? That's what I keep telling myself.

How are you all doing today?

[Photo via Audrey Hepburn Complex]

Dream Home: Pirate Ship Bedroom.

For some reason, I've always been intrigued by pirates. So I couldn't help but smile when I spotted this bedroom by designer Steve Kuhl. Doesn't it look fun? :)

Man Candy Monday.

Happy Monday again, friends! Here's hoping your week is off to a rousing start. And speaking of rousing, we've got a rousing guy today. He was one of the original rockers. He taught us about blue suede shoes and wanted to be our teddy bear. He also had that hip swivel thing down to a science...

ELVIS PRESLEY!!!!!!!!!!

Etsy Love: Dear Blank.

The site Dear Blank let's people write hilarious little notes to people, places and even things (like the Pythagorean Theorem of all things!). They've now opened an etsy shop with some great posters like these! What do you think, friends? Aren't they neat?

Who would you like to write a note to if you got the chance? xoxo

I Miss You, Dad.

Today marks 8 years since my father's death. I couldn't let the day pass without doing a post about him. I find myself reflecting differently this year. My family is really trying to make it a day of honoring him instead of wallowing in our grief. I thought I'd share my top 10 favorite things about my dad:

1. He loved his family more than anything.

2. He was funny and loved to laugh.

3. He was generous and caring.

4. He could talk for hours about anything and everything.

5. He was so proud when he got his bachelors degree at age 50.

6. He didn't care what other people thought and marched to the beat of his own drum

7. He loved his job at the university.

8. He loved the summer and loved taking us to the park. He had as much fun as we did.

9. He loved volunteering.

10. He loved to eat, especially meat and dessert. That must be where I get my love of food.

I miss you, dad, and know that I think about you every day. xoxo

Word Search Tote.

For all you word nerds: An awesome word search tote bag! Wouldn't you love to carry it around? I'm a word search gal myself.

[Via Swissmiss]

How I Feel (In 5 Photos) Wednesday.

"You're still the one I run to..." --Shania Twain

[Photos via dreaming]