Tuesday, March 26, 2013

Love Lounge: 3 things I've learned about bonding with my father

Do you find it so much easier to talk to your mom about everything? Life can be tough, that’s for sure, but there’s one person who may know a little more than you think: Your dear old dad. He may wear funny Hawaiian shirts and embarrass you in front of your friends, but when you were little, you two were probably firmly attached at the hip, having tea parties or laughing over an ice cream cone or going fishing on the lake over the weekends together. Now, it seems like you have more in common with your mailman than your father. How did things ever get to this point, you wonder? But those day don’t have to be gone forever. And you want to know the best part? Your dad misses those times – and misses spending them with you. I've been thinking about all the good times I spent with my father. Here are the 3 tips I learned to strengthened the father-daughter bond...

Take a walk -- and just talk
Growing up, my father and I had some of our best conversations on the short walks home from the neighborhood pool during the summer. We didn't talk about anything philosophical or Earth-shattering in the grand scheme of things, but it made me feel close to my dad and showed me just how much he cared.

Ask him about his childhood
My father always loved telling stories from his boyhood days. Apparently, he was quite the mischievous one. There was a whole part of his life I knew nothing about, and I knew I needed to hear as many stories as I could before it was too late.

Visit him at work
In college, I used to spend the afternoons studying in my father's office while he worked on fixing all sorts of gadgets. I'd be wading through my huge journalism and psychology textbooks and the hear him whistling down the hall. T never failed to make me smile. Plus, I think he secretly liked showing me everything he was working on.
So, friends, how do you bond with your father? Do you have any traditions or rituals that you share? What do you wish your father knew? xoxo

[Photos via We Heart It]

3 comments:

  1. My dad and I have a strained relationship. I didn't do things the way he wanted and I think in some ways he's disappointed. That makes it hard for us to have a relationship. Yeah, I've made mistakes. But I wish he could be proud of my independence and doing things my way, ya know?

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  2. Totally, Krysten! We all want to make our parents proud, and I know that I often wonder what my dad would think of me now.

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  3. I noticed at one point that I would immediately ask for my mom if my dad answered the phone. Now, I make it a point to talk with him for a while before I ask for her.

    Over the years, the more I make decisions for myself, the better my relationship with him has become. For so long, I was worried about doing the wrong thing for fear that my parents would become upset and not be a part of my life. Firstly, that was totally irrational on my part. Secondly, what kind of life would I have if I always made decisions for everyone else?

    So, I put on my big girl underpants and started just being me. And everything worked out, no one fell off the face of my planet, and my relationship with myself and others have improved.

    I'm fortunate that my parents are both pretty introspective and forward thinking. When I make off the wall decisions, they usually think it's awesome. As a young girl, I never would have thought they would have supported any off the wall decision- especially when I decided to get married without even knowing the guy a year by the time of our wedding date. But they trust me. Maybe they've changed over time since they know I am responsible for myself; I know I definitely have.

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Your lovely comments make my day so much sweeter! Thanks for stopping by and saying hello!

xoxo

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