Hello there -- here we are. We meet again. Well, we're never really apart, obviously, but it's not often that I actually take the time to reflect on our relationship. At least, it's not something I've spent a lot of time doing lately, anyway. And, really, maybe that's my mistake. In the past, I used to "check in" quite regularly. I mean, I wrote about you for xoJane. I talked about you in Video Hellos. I've criticized, critiqued and celebrated every part of you. But sometimes? It still feels like we're on different teams. I know that probably sounds crazy -- how can we be on opposing teams when you're me and I'm you. And yet, it's all too true sometimes. Most of the time, I can look in the mirror and smile at what I see staring back at me. After all, I've worked hard to come to terms with my disability and its place in my life. I won't pretend like it's been an easy journey because, as you know, it hasn't been. It's been a lot of give and take, a whole bunch of back and forth. So, yes, sometimes I can't help but smile when I see just how far we've come.
But other times? I can't help but feel like we've got a lot more work left to do. Does everyone feel that way? I suppose it's natural -- I mean, we're our own worst critics -- and sometimes, you just can't help comparing yourself to other people. I do want to apologize for that, though. Because that's not really fair to us. Maybe I need to be a bit more gentle with myself and cut myself some slack when it comes to loving myself and my body. I'm sorry for all those times I've called you "fat." I'm sorry for all the times I made you feel like ugly was all you were. I'm sorry for all the times I made you feel like your physical appearance determined your worth. It wasn't fair. And it will never be fair. So, on that front, yes, we still have some work ahead of us.
[Second photo via We Heart It]