Wednesday, March 05, 2014

Love Lounge: Dating in the age of Facebook

We've already established that dating and social media don't always mesh well together -- Google, anyone? And it can be even harder to know where the line is between what is considered acceptable and what will place you *thisclose* to resembling a lead actress in a Lifetime movie. I mean, think about it. It used to be that you'd break up with someone, throw all their stuff in a box and that would be it. You'd never have to see them again. But now, there's really no cutting of the cord when it comes to the end of a relationship. Thanks to Facebook, unless you listen to your rational head and unfriend your ex, you'll still get a play-by-play of their lives -- photos included, of course.

And let's just be honest here: When it comes to love, we never listen to our heads. The heart is always louder, and its resolve can be pretty weak. Chances are, it would take the strength of a few mountains to get us to cut those Facebook ties.
Even though my dating slate is pretty clean, I'm still victim to this. Facebook is not a friendly place for a girl who tends to fall in love too quickly and crush hard. Trust me, it's not. It's practically a jungle out there. And with the few clicks, forgetting about certain boys is next to impossible.

Don't believe me? There's some definitive science to back things up, and who can argue with cold, hard facts? A University of California study of 24 subjects between the ages of 19 and 34 found that more than one-third couldn't bring themselves to delete the digital version of their love story such as photos, and the remaining content acted as a "constant reminder."
Does Facebook play a role in your dating life? How? Has its role changed over the years, or has it remained pretty consistent? Let's chat, friends! xoxo

[Photos via We Heart It]


  1. I blocked a crazy ex-boyfriend on Facebook. He then got a mutual friend to friend request me so he could still keep up with what I was doing. When I realised what was going on, I had to block that mutual friend as well. He then tried making a connection on LinkedIn. Blocked him there too. He then kept offering me loads of work (I freelance). I turned it down. Eventually I had to have a very forthright talk with him and mention the police. That finally worked. What a nutter!!

  2. When I get out of a relationship, one of the first things I do is delete them off Facebook (and any social media for that matter). The digital contents such as photos, notes, etc. are there because I tend to forget those. Just a few months, I finally got around to deleting photos from a 2011 relationship. It was such a time consumer consider I don't want to delete a full album, just photos of us.

  3. It'd be like throwing away that shoebox full of memories. But a lot more accessible. I would flail with dating right now.

  4. Great questions and interesting link to that study. My husband and I got together long before Facebook was a thing -- heck, probably even long before Mark Zuckerberg was even able to walk, let along code. (And now I feel old. Moving on...). When I see friends getting divorced or breaking up after a long-term relationship, I always wonder how awkward that must be to decide on whether or not to remove photos of each other from their FB pages. It certainly is a different dating world out there.

  5. Like a couple other ladies who commented - I'm glad there was no FaceBook back-in-the-day ! But I can confess - I still have pics of pictures of high school sweet heart (puppy love - friends in school) now that im in the 2nd half century of life - I guess I can throw them away LOL


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