Wednesday, December 16, 2015

MEMO TO MEN: On Mixed Messages

TO: Men all over the planet
FROM: Melissa
RE: Please DON'T say these words ever again!
DATE: December 16th, 2015
Well, boys, today's topic has weighed heavily on my mind for quite awhile now. And first, as a little disclaimer: Lest you think I have absolutely zero idea of what I'm talking about, I do have first-hand experience with this epidemic. I know of what I speak. Maybe all too well.

Now that we got that PSA out of the way, I found this pic awhile ago and I practically screamed out loud. To myself. Well, more like at the computer, half expecting it to reply back to me.

This picture? It spoke the truth. At least to me, anyway. It seems like there are so many darn mixed messages when it comes to dating. I mean, you meet someone. You get to know them as a person. You realize, I don't know, that, "Hey, there's something about this person. I think I like him." You spend some time wondering what the other person is thinking -- OK, maybe a lot of time wondering -- and just when you think things might be going somewhere, you find yourself hearing those dreadful words...

"Let's hang out and see where it goes."

"We should do lunch."

You know. Those sorts of words. They kind of leave you reeling, quite honestly. Because where are you supposed to go with them? How are you even supposed to know how to respond? Is it a date?

Are you scared? A tad bit gun shy, perhaps? Is that why you never seem to want to nail anything down definitively? I just don't know. Maybe this whole tango is nothing more than a bunch of smoke and mirrors -- you know, a good way for you to keep your options open.

And, really, it can all be rather hurtful. I mean, look at it from the perspective of the person on the receiving end of such an invitation.
Yes, I know I called this phenomenon an epidemic at the beginning of this post. Sure, that may seem a bit harsh, but I honestly think it applies here. I can see how it can be easy to get caught up in the "easy out" approach, but I highly doubt that it's very effective in the long run. After all, a direct, to-the-point, say-exactly-what-you-feel guy is incredibly hard to come by these days. Wouldn't you want to do everything in your power to STAND OUT from the crowd?

So, go ahead, I dare you to change up your language the next time you approach a woman with your date intentions -- you don't even have to be overly saccharin and romantic gesture-y about it, either. Tell her that you'd like to take her out on a date to get to know her better. Be specific about a time and a place. And then? Hopefully, watch those sparks fly! What do you say, boys?? Are you up for it...? xoxo

[Photos via We Heart It]

1 comment:

  1. So... what if they actually do just want to hang out/have lunch, with no romantic intentions? What are they supposed to say?


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