TO: Men all over the planet
RE: Feeling oh-so-very 'lost'
DATE: February 4th, 2016
I often wonder where those Lost Boys come from and what exactly has happened in their life to make them the way they are. I mean, is there some sort of factory that just keeps churning them out by the generation full? Is there a mold that said factory uses to ensure that each one is the same?
As you can probably tell, it's pretty hard for me to wrap my head around the entire concept. But what's even harder for me to come to terms with is my apparent weakness when it comes to these boys. OK, let me just be perfectly clear here: I'm seemingly unable to resist falling for these types. I know it's wrong. I know things will just end in heartbreak. I know we'd never be on the same page about anything. And yet, for some weird, mysterious reason, I get it in my head that it will be different with me. Oh, yes, I wholeheartedly believed in that fantasy. I was going to save that Lost Boy and turn him into a Found Man; it was going to be such a beautiful experience that we share together. I was going to get him to finally open up to me, revealing his the self at long last and we were going to live out our days in glorious happiness.
The truth is, though, it's not different with me. It never is and I should know better -- should have learned my lesson by now or something. Because like the quote warns, I don't want to lose myself in the process. That's the very last thing I want to do and it's quite a scary thought, isn't it? How a reasonably self-assured and independent lady like myself could get so darn caught up in trying to make someone into the person I want them to be. So here's to breaking bad habits once and for all, boys... xoxo