tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8773709208108297978.post7850524057338871216..comments2023-11-16T03:37:52.470-06:00Comments on So about what I said...: Love Lounge: On alternative answers to that four-word questionMelissa Blakehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09975477573895818097noreply@blogger.comBlogger13125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8773709208108297978.post-89417786510768889522012-08-17T14:08:27.848-05:002012-08-17T14:08:27.848-05:00I've always said something along the lines of ...I've always said something along the lines of "no one I'm interested in at the moment" since it was usually the truth. I've never asked anyone why they're single and can't imagine doing so, but I do ask people if they're seeing anyone usually just out of a getting-to-know you curiosity or because relationships/dating have naturally come up in the conversation. Lauranoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8773709208108297978.post-58544018338767330222012-08-17T12:30:55.708-05:002012-08-17T12:30:55.708-05:00I usually gave a jokey answer like, "Well the...I usually gave a jokey answer like, "Well there just aren't enough supermodel billionaires going around! Why, do you know one??"<br /><br />I'd maybe say something like, "No, haven't met anybody special" which will be true and sort of implies that you're dating around and will probably end the subject.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8773709208108297978.post-13379961576119792012-08-17T11:15:17.011-05:002012-08-17T11:15:17.011-05:00I think it is up to single girls to change the con...I think it is up to single girls to change the connotations of the word 'single'. Perhaps its a movie stereotype that all girls are fed up of being single, and so moan about it to their friends, and so it is a negative. Whereas if single people (who are very happy!) show their joys of being independant, it might change peoples ideas.<br /><br />On a different note (on such an excellent question and blog post!) sometimes I am curious whether people are taken or not, but is there a good way to ask?<br /><br />Please let me know if there is, I dont want to make people feel bad!Mindy Dayhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07926655447383898991noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8773709208108297978.post-49870150003686877852012-08-17T10:50:29.325-05:002012-08-17T10:50:29.325-05:00Mandy, i never thought about married people asking...Mandy, i never thought about married people asking, but you're so right!! <br /><br />And Anon, that's true! We do bring a lot of our own baggage when it comes to how we feel about this question. xoxoMelissa Blakehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09975477573895818097noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8773709208108297978.post-81131593526815470022012-08-17T10:46:18.517-05:002012-08-17T10:46:18.517-05:00Awww, Alex! I like your response about feeling jus...Awww, Alex! I like your response about feeling just as great being single...that's so important!Melissa Blakehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09975477573895818097noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8773709208108297978.post-86932591562633792362012-08-17T10:44:41.793-05:002012-08-17T10:44:41.793-05:00oh, those are clever answers, Pink!! Would definit...oh, those are clever answers, Pink!! Would definitely shut people up!Melissa Blakehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09975477573895818097noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8773709208108297978.post-84798968535080990562012-08-16T19:02:48.460-05:002012-08-16T19:02:48.460-05:00Also, you are clearly projecting your own view tha...Also, you are clearly projecting your own view that being single is an inferior state. How do you know the question isn't loaded the other way, like, are you single? You are so lucky!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8773709208108297978.post-25619186936845531592012-08-16T18:24:02.013-05:002012-08-16T18:24:02.013-05:00No one has ever asked me these questions, except i...No one has ever asked me these questions, except in an informational way, like asking what I do, but as with most, if not all questions I'm asked, I'd answer with, wait for it, the truth. Are you telling the truth with these answers? Susannoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8773709208108297978.post-77020711502060458832012-08-16T16:58:56.542-05:002012-08-16T16:58:56.542-05:00I get asked this question a lot by relatives that ...I get asked this question a lot by relatives that I see not as often as others, and it really doesn't bother me. Although I can see where some ask it in a "why in the world I'm not in a relationship" kind of way! To me, when a guy comes along that I'm interested in, cool, I'll get to know him and we'll see where it goes. Honestly, I'm totally immersed in college for the next 10+ years and building my future is more important to me than a guy.Aprilnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8773709208108297978.post-13305280405412943112012-08-16T16:33:10.117-05:002012-08-16T16:33:10.117-05:00I have lots of feelings on this one. I was pretty ...I have lots of feelings on this one. I was pretty much single until I was 25, and that question hurt a lot when I got it then, because, honestly, I had no idea why I was single! I had lots of friends, a job, hobbies, and I'm pretty fun (if I humbly say so myself), so it felt like there was some hidden thing wrong with me that was scaring off the guys. So, whenever I got asked that then, I would just make some sort of joke about men, while dying on the inside.<br /><br />Currently, I just got out of a year and a half relationship, and I'm still a bit raw. When I get asked about my singleness now though, it hurts just because it reminds me of everything I've been going through, but I don't take it as a marker of something being wrong with me. I can honestly say, "I'm not looking for someone right now, as I just got out of a relationship, but I hope to be back on the market when I feel ready." I think my perspective has changed.<br /><br />But oh! When married friends ask you this kind of in a weird, smug way...? HATE. Mandyhttp://ohdizzle.wordpress.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8773709208108297978.post-72360616277227274532012-08-16T15:33:29.100-05:002012-08-16T15:33:29.100-05:00Hi Melissa! First of all I love your post. I'v...Hi Melissa! First of all I love your post. I've never had a serious relationship so I've been hearing that question since I was a teenager, and in my case, followed by "why?". At first I was so embarrassed, later I started to give all kind of excuses, my favorite was: "Being in a couple should make you feel better than single, and I feel great as single so my standard are really high..." ;)<br />At some point I didn't care anymore about the question, now I realized no one asks me anymore about it, I think everybody gave up on me! ;)Alex Musettihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14342060946643899356noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8773709208108297978.post-60134413722370798492012-08-16T15:33:14.711-05:002012-08-16T15:33:14.711-05:00Oh, question... The ones you mentioned still work ...Oh, question... The ones you mentioned still work for you? Or are you looking for new ones? :)<br /><br />P.S.: The older I get, the more I believe that you have to become more aggressive & outrageous with your answers to shut people up.PinkPanthresshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08702242762251577851noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8773709208108297978.post-23953998836105579582012-08-16T15:25:40.707-05:002012-08-16T15:25:40.707-05:00I used to tell guys that I am a hardcore lesbian, ...I used to tell guys that I am a hardcore lesbian, that would shut them up.<br /><br />And these days I tell them I am either Asexual or my newest thing is, telling them that I am only <i>attracted to transgender people who let me be the man in bed</i> (I am female) that makes them run faster away than a cobra can bite... :DPinkPanthresshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08702242762251577851noreply@blogger.com